How to believe in yourself and your abilities?

Belief in oneself is something that moves a person and leads them to realize dreams that may have seemed impossible until yesterday. It leads us to be whatever we want to be: great entrepreneurs, the best teachers, dedicated doctors, marathoners, artists - whatever is inside us.

In psychology, belief in oneself and one's abilities are intertwined in terms of self-esteem and self-confidence. Although the two terms are similar, they are often misunderstood by synonyms.

Namely, self-esteem is the experience we have about ourselves and our identity, that is, the experience of how much we value ourselves, while self-confidence refers to the assessment of our own abilities to perform various tasks or forms of behavior.

Both are built throughout life and drastically affect the quality of our lives.

When it comes to self-belief, self-confidence plays a dominant role. It is the belief that we are capable of making decisions, overcoming challenges and various tasks, coping with change, learning, and thinking. It is quite normal that self-confidence varies, but sometimes it is only short-term caused by a bad mood and should be distinguished from long-term low self-esteem that hinders us from progressing in life.

Whatever form it is, it is possible to jump in and work on it. Of course, for people with low self-esteem who have not changed over the years, this will be a slightly longer process, but small steps can lead to success.

Here's what you can do.

1. Make a list of your strengths

Although it sounds cheesy, this is an exercise that can really make a difference. No person in the world is worthless; each of us has our own virtues and that is exactly what makes us special. Write everything you are good at on a piece of paper, and read that list every time you find it difficult.

For example, you may be a good friend, interior design is a joke for you, you know how to lay tiles yourself, you have stories to write, you cook almost like a chef, you have a sense of fashion ... Continue the list.

2. Think about your successes so far

When you look back on your past, what are you proud of? Just remember how you passed the exam you studied for weeks, how you felt on graduation or graduation day, how your boss praised you for an idea.

Remember all the fears you've overcome so far, for example, when you went on a date despite being very nervous.

3. Work on learning new skills

One of the best ways to develop self-confidence is to learn new skills. Once you master a new skill that until yesterday may have seemed impossible to you, your self-confidence will inevitably increase. It can be any practical skill you need at work or something related to your free time and hobbies.

4. Avoid comparisons with others

The worst thing we can do is compare ourselves to others. Yes, social media is forcing us to do it, whether we like it or not, and it’s hard to see someone who sat with us on a bench have a better career, a harmonious marriage, a big house, kids, and anything we might have wanted but failed to achieve.

But such comparisons do harm only to you. Besides, you just never know what’s really going on in someone’s four walls and whether the person you’re comparing yourself to is really happy or just pretending to be like that.

Instead, compare yourself to yourself. Look where you were a year or two ago. What have you achieved since then? What has changed in your life?

5. Take care of yourself in everyday situations

The trick recommended by psychotherapists is to start exercising self-confidence in everyday situations, starting with the little things. Don't be silent, say everything that bothers you. For example, if you are dissatisfied with the hairstyle, make it clear to the hairdresser and ask him to fix it. Don't just keep quiet and cry at home.

If at any time anywhere you feel that you have been wronged, say so right away on the spot.

Once you step on that train, you won’t be able to stop, believe me, and you’ll finally feel like you have a voice.