What makes women unique and special?
How to empower yourself? The psychologist reveals what every woman and girl must be aware of in order to live on their own.
All research shows that some of the problems that burden women around the world are related to what makes women unique and special - menstruation, breastfeeding, and menopause. Something that is so much theirs and specifically often becomes the subject of condemnation and reproachful views of others. As women, we tend to impose too high expectations on ourselves. We think that we have to be up to the task in everything, we are afraid of criticism from others, but the only thing we should really be is to be happy and enjoy every period of life, with all the challenges we face. Because, what would life be like if everything went smoothly in it? We would not realize how strong we are and how much we can.
And what if it leaks to me?!
No matter how old they are, this is every woman's nightmare. Every other woman feels uncomfortable when she is menstruating, hides pads, doesn’t want to talk about it in front of others, or even in front of her doctors. The roots of that shame lie in social values and attitudes towards the expression of feelings, open communication, emotions of others, gender equality, etc. In many families, some topics are simply not talked about. One should not see or know when a woman is menstruating in the house. A ‘neat and considerate’ woman will hide this information from her household, she will not burden them with her problems, she will not talk about her pain, and when she is not well. Information that is kept secret often imposes a feeling of shame on us. For example, when someone in the family is an alcoholic, it is not talked about, it is a family secret, which then causes shame in all members. A similar mechanism develops in the case of the menstrual cycle ', says a psychologist.
Another reason girls feel uncomfortable is inappropriate jokes or comments about menstruation and PMS. Mocking classmates, fear of not noticing a sign of blood on pants or skirts, are the reason for the strong feeling of repulsion and shame of girls during the menstrual cycle. How can this be changed?
First, every mother should change her traditional attitudes towards menstruation in her family, talk about it as something normal, mention her experiences and feelings, ask for help if she needs it. At the same time, it is important to build an atmosphere of equal dignity in the family, which would mean respecting the feelings, needs, ideas, opinions of all family members. Fathers should be active in supporting daughters.
Breastfeeding
Although we all know that there is no nobler act than breastfeeding, with greater benefits for the child, many women are still reluctant to breastfeed in public. Prolonged breastfeeding is an increasingly common option, but it is also often a matter of public condemnation. But what if a woman can't or doesn't want to breastfeed? And that is her right, but again a matter of condemnation and reproachful looks. Indeed, many women feel like 'bad mothers' because they cannot satisfy their children in that way. It is very important to inform young people about it in a timely manner. It is important to teach mothers how to breastfeed, but at the same time inform them that difficulties are possible and that they are not to blame. On the other hand, women are exposed to criticism and reproachful views even when everything goes smoothly with breastfeeding, especially when they do it in public.
'Breastfeeding is a personal act, a private relationship between mother and child, a form of communication, and it is very important that mother and child in these moments are focused on each other, without interference. Such a relationship is more often possible to achieve in privacy when no one interrupts them. However, if there are no such conditions, and the child is hungry, I see no reason why his need should not be met in public ', says the psychologist noting that in a quality relationship of two or more people it is important to check how people around us feel and, in a situation where we choose to breastfeed in public, ensure a level of privacy, which is the best option for 'all parties'.
Am I a woman enough?
Menopause is a period of great changes for a woman, both physically and mentally. Many have a hard time dealing with them and often 'suffer in silence' , because they mistakenly think that they must be strong, up to the task, successful and happy.
'The way we deal with menopause also depends on how we look at life in general, what our goals are, how flexible we are in accepting change. It is important that, with all the responsibilities we take on as women and mothers, we do not forget about our interests and hobbies and our own growth and development, because the richness of our inner life will help us find the joy of life ', advises the psychologist.
Every period of life is an opportunity for a woman to 'grab' the best of life and be what she wants to be. Along the way, it is important to have the support of close people and understand that life are happy moments and change that will merge into a mosaic of life.
